I'm A Volcano Denier

Some people deny the Holocaust, some deny global warming, some deny Barack Obama was born anywhere. Not me on any of that.

I deny the existence of volcanoes. Think about it: It doesn't make a bit of sense. There's no fire in the hole that comes up. There's no air down there, because the air's all in the sky. And you need air for fire.

So I think it's all a big hoax, something they do on a Hollywood stage, if Hollywood even exists. Count me among the true Bobby Jindal disbelievers. We don't believe in volcanoes.

Now we have this so-called volcano in Iceland, called by some big obviously fake word, Eyjafjallajokul. Say what?! It's likely the whole thing is faked. I saw some of the "smoke plumes." It looked to me like a hack Photoshop job. Some of the smoke billows were clearly reused over and over to make the composite picture.

And if this stunt "volcano" wasn't enough, now these "scientists," who ought to try doing something honest for a living, are saying there could be a volcano 10 times worse coming along ... same country, Iceland. How convenient, to claim there's a volcano, then to situate it in a country that no one can go to to verify it.

Who knows what these "scientists" are up to? I know they're smoking something, and I don't think it came from a hole in the ground!