Graduations And Receptions

It's that time of year again, for the endless procession of graduation ceremonies and receptions.

I know when you're the kid graduating, you've been there every step of the way -- through years -- and it seems like a big deal to finally be graduating. But when you're apart from the kids in their everyday lives all those years, like long lost nephews and cousins, you hear they're graduating and you go, Weren't they just born?

Time goes exceedingly fast for people you don't keep track of. The same thing for pregnancies. If you're facing a pregnancy of your own, the nine months crawls by, because of doctor's appointments and other numerous inconveniences. But when you hear about someone else being pregnant, pretty soon they're having the child "next month," and you're like, That was quick!

As for graduation ceremonies, maybe nothing mankind has come up with can be more torturous -- we need to bring our Gitmo detainees to a typical graduation ceremony; they'll spill their guts immediately to get away. The receptions are not as bad, of course, because you get cake, nuts, M&Ms, little snack wafers, etc. And the graduate usually looks like he or she doesn't really want to be there, so you're not in a lot of conversation. What they're really trying to avoid is the endless sequence of people asking, So what are you going to be doing now? Everyone's curious, but the question's been asked to death.

I'm going to be missing most graduation ceremonies of family and friends. But I can still send money and that keeps me in their good graces.